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Thursday, May 20, 2010

Day 16, Is that a light at the end of the tunnel I see?

Ok, so tomorrow is the big day. We're loading up the truck. I don't know whether to rejoice or have my standard bipolar conniption fit. We're technically not done packing, but a lot of it can't be done until we're actually ready to get loading... like taking beds apart and moving dressers. I'd feel a diaper-load better if everything was actually already in the garage ready to load, but realistically, I know that can't happen. As much as I wish I had Samantha Stephens bewitching powers, I have to accept I'm human and things can't get done with just a twitch of my nose; much as I'd like them to.

Luckily tomorrow, I have some big burly help coming to load up the truck while a couple of the "chicks" and I finish up the last bit of packing. Today was a good day as far as packing went. I had some really motivated friends come help me and we made up for a lot that didn't happen when I had a less motivated friend "help" me the other day. The stress level is still higher than a meth-addict on a four day bender, but I'm getting there. Once the truck is loaded, I may run out of interesting things to say... I find unpacking to be much less stressful, and I can take my time and make everything perfect; just like my lovingly anal-retentive husband would like!

I tell ya what, I don't know how I got through the last couple of months without my shrink. I had my last appointment with him today, and I almost cried. Now I have to start over and break in someone new. And, let me tell you, finding a shrink that fits your personality is like finding a bra that doesn't leave horrendous strap marks in your shoulders. So, I guess I will still have something to write about in the next few months... I hate having to break in new doctors, much less shrinks. It's almost like trying to find a new best friend, or interviewing a prospective employee. You have to be careful. Some will hand out pills like candy, some won't give you anything, and then there's the perfect mix of the doctor who will give you only what you need, and nothing more. That's my new mission, as soon as I get mostly unpacked.

Well folks, I'm off to la-la land, only to rise early and pick up my U-Haul and get moving yet again... I really need a vacation!!!

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Super EARLY good morning!

I have no idea why I'm even bothering posting this late/early... nobody's up, and nobody's gonna read it... so I guess I'm doing this for myself. I had what I THOUGHT was an inspirational and successful day. Problem being, I actually looked around my house and almost crapped my pants. I literally have two days left to get everything packed in order to get loaded onto the truck, and there is SOOO much more to do. Damn, I knew I was good at procrastinating, but I never knew I was that good!  I am so screwed right now. Unless I have little miracle fairies come to my rescue, I may never get moved in time.

I know I've said it before, but I really do have too much crap.... Anybody want any?  I've been making my garbage man's life a living hell the last three weeks, and I still can't get everything packed on time. This is just getting to the point of ridiculous.  There is still so much left to do... I swear that if stress were rainbows, I'd have one extremely colorful life!

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Good deed done, do I get good Karma now?

Ok, lots to report on, but very little time. I have to type up notes for a friend's kid, finish packing the bedroom, and one of these days, bet my bootie to sleep.... I do not foresee sleep in my near future. The one positive thing that happened, I THINK I helped find a friend a car. At least, I HOPE so. It's been a rough couple of days, and car searching has been the only thing that's kept me relatively sane. I hope like hell that it works out for her. So, how crazy does that really make me? That I would prefer to pick out cars than pack my own crap????

Well, at least most of the packing is done. I only have like fifty more boxes to go, and then I can call it a day... or night...  or next day...or day after... Can you tell that things aren't going super smoothly? Things might be different if I had children that actually DID what they were told. But that's just a pipe dream I think. I have always thought that other people's children were always better behaved, but I've since learned that ALL children are big ole butt-heads!

Monday, May 17, 2010

Yet another detour...

I'm starting to notice a pattern developing here. Every other day I get nothing done. Today, I was contending with a splitting headache ALL day long, so that's today's excuse. Yesterday went really well, so here's hoping tomorrow we can knock out most of the rest of the packing.

This is yet another excuse to back up my claim that I'm not cut out for manual labor. At least, not on a daily basis. We have three days left to get the rest of my house packed up. Talk about a time crunch! We have to pick up the U-Haul first thing Friday morning, and I'm starting to sweat it. So much so, I may have to start sleeping naked! Uh-oh, don't get a mental image on that one... it's not pretty!

This is when I really miss my twenty year old body, um make that nineteen... I don't miss the pregnant twenty year old body... oops! So, what was I saying? Oh right, being younger would have made this go so much quicker, and I'd probably have a lot less bruises. Oh, who am I kidding? I'd still have the bruises. I've always been pretty klutzy. But, I'd definitely be more efficient. If anyone happens to invent a time machine in the next day or two, I'll take it, whatever the cost!

Sunday, May 16, 2010

Victory shall be mine!

Progress, Progress, Progress! At last.... (sigh)  Even though I spent a couple of hours assisting someone ELSE too! Much props go out to my neighbor and her son. He "motivated", (and when I say motivated in quotes, I mean he did most of the work) my son to get all of the toys packed up. One room down there. Then his mom came over later in the evening and knocked out the mess that we like to call our office. WOO-HOO. I know what you're thinking... while they were doing all that, what the hell was I doing? Well, I did manage to accomplish some things of my own as well. I've gotten the bathrooms packed up, you'd be surprised how much bathroom crap we have... Well, maybe not, since you've heard the scary story of the kitchen.

I was actually getting worried that we might not be ready to load up on Friday, but hope springs eternal, and I shall be victorious. I may not be all in one piece, but victorious I shall be. So far today I've counted 13 new bumps and bruises, I'm not counting the already 17 currently in odd places on my body. I must say the oddest one is a bruise that only I have the specialized skills to incur. It's a gigantic oblong, black and purple bruise located BEHIND my right knee. Seriously... how the hell does that happen?!?!?

Ok, I'd better get myself to bed so I can hopefully stay on track and stay motivated tomorrow!

Saturday, May 15, 2010

I was NOT built for manual labor

Ok, for starters... I dropped a fridge on someone today. Not my proudest moment, but he survived, and I'll move on. I hadn't planned on posting today as I had planned on NOT being home tonight, but circumstances what they are, I decided it would be smarter to head home and get a head start on tomorrow. Another fine mess you've gotten me into, Stanley... (Only us real old folks will get that reference)

Anyway, relocated a fridge, after injuring a friend in the process, down to my folks today. This situation was by NO means fun.... Dad's garage fridge is so full, that you literally have to put your hand in the opening as you open it so things don't fall out. We had to remove the stuff from his old fridge, reposition the doors on the new fridge, and then restock the new fridge. Five hours later.... I was headed to visit my sister for a whopping ten minutes before we all had to head to dinner.

At least dinner was nice, but I really didn't get to say a good farewell to my family. No biggie, I guess. I be back up in a few weeks to do a charity event. So, not so much to report on tonight, but I'm sure tomorrow will be full of stupidosity as I attempt to wrap knick-knacks and collectibles. Wish me luck!

Friday, May 14, 2010

Day 10 Preparation, Preparation, Preparation... Not really

Didn't do a whole lot of anything today. Woke up, it was cold and rainy. At lunch time, it was warm and sunny. After school, it was cold and rainy. Mother Nature must be hitting menopause or something, because her hot and cold flashes are coming too fast and too furious.

Tomorrow will be somewhat of a break from the moving thing. We're heading down to see my folks, dropping off a few things and celebrating a late birthday for my nephew. Other than the hour of fighting each way in the car, it should be a relatively relaxing trip.

Only had one minor casualty happen today... It was during bath time for the little one. I couldn't possibly tell you how she did it, but she somehow managed to get her botton lip stuck in the tiny little opening for her shampoo bottle. Strangest thing you ever did see... a shampoo bottle hanging from your four-year-old's lip. Well, a quick yank, a little blood, and an ice pack made everything all better. She probably now has the cleanest human lip in the world. (She really was feeling just fine after a minute of TLC from MOM)

And, now it's time for Mom to have some TLC with the pillows (And I mean snuggling them, you pervs).
Sleep well my little chickadees, and I will probably catch up with you on Sunday. Goodnight.

Thursday, May 13, 2010

Tell her what she's won Johnny!

You know it's one of those days to just climb back in bed, when you can't even climb out in the first place. As I said earlier, I woke up with massive back-pain... Well, pain be damned, I still managed to get a little bit done, again as I said before. But, alas, procrastination has once again reared its ugly head. I did manage to get all the boxes taped up and ready for use, but then my youngest child, who we shall now refer to as "the evil one", managed to put the kibosh on all things productive.

Why is it, that when you're actually attempting to accomplish something relatively important, your children decide it's "THEIR" time? The evil one chose to barrage me with mundane and unnecessary questions and requests. If it was just "I'm hungry" or "I'm thirsty", I wouldn't have nearly lost all my marbles. But, the kid has a MILLION fricking toys and decided today was the day that they weren't fun anymore. Even Spongebob was of no help. I tried reasoning, I tried including her, I tried giving her a job, I tried yelling, I tried bribing, all to no avail. I was NOT going to get away without giving her my undivided attention as she bombarded me with requests to go play with her friend... who wasn't home, and won't be until Sunday. No matter how many times I tried to explain to her the situation in as simple of words as I could, there was no placating the evil one. She screamed, kicked, threw the standard four-year-old tantrum, and now, I mean, JUST now, she has finally settled down and is more than likely passed out from her hysterics.

And now, when I could actually get some work done, my pathetic butt needs to go to sleep myself in order to attempt to make it to the stupid clinic TOMORROW for my lab work... My lack of the ability to remove myself from bed this morning prevented that from happening. So, I have lost the fight today... I shall pick myself up by my bootstraps yet again tomorrow, to attempt the neglected tasks from today. I bid you all a fond farewell and sweet dreams... I'm taking a sleeping pill, and I'm NOT sharing!

Day 9, it's my anniversary, aww shucks!

Today, Hubby and I have been married for five years. A day for celebration, don't you think? Well, maybe it would be if I weren't up to my eyeballs in boxes and bubblewrap. Oh, and also maybe if he were less than three thousand miles away from me right now. The sad truth of the matter is that we've only celebrated two of our anniversaries. He's literally been gone for more than half of our marriage. No, he's not locked up in some prison somewhere, he's been working diligently and dangerously in the middle east for nearly three years. I have gotten to see him a handful of times, so it's not completely horrible. Just kinda tough trying to raise three kids on my own... and don't even get me started on this whole moving thing!

Whoops.. too late!

So I mentioned last night we ran out of boxes... It was a good thing too, because this morning it took a crane and the National Guard to get me out of bed. A couple of pain-killers later, I became somewhat mobile and managed to get all the clothes folded, hung-up and put away. No small feat, if you've ever seen my mountains of laundry.  So, now, I sit and ponder where to go next. I should be lighting fires under my childrens rears toget them going on packing their stuff. My theory for them is "if it ain't packed, it ain't going." And yes, I teach my children to use terrible grammar, just to keep their teachers occupied. You know they really don't have enough to do with the 20 other kids in their classes.

Other than the smoke emanating from my childrens' backsides, I'm thinking it might be time to start packing up the knick-knacks. I mean, I'm not sure how I'd be able to function without severe back-pain anymore anyway. Might as well kick myself when I'm down, right?

Maybe if I feel sorry for myself long enough, I'll develop some pity and help myself out. Again, this is when multiple personalities would come in handy.

Anywho, I guess I'd better start building me some more boxes to fill.... They aren't going to do it themselves.

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Where there's a will, there's a delay...

We've finally managed to get the majority of the kitchen packed with only one casualty (a wine glass). But I'm left feeling unsuccessful since we ultimately ran out of boxes before the job was completely done. I kinda threw the whole "let's save the food until we're ready to actually leave" thing out the window, so there's very little food, one cup, some paper plates and a couple of plastic forks left. I think I may have successfully screwed myself here. Guess I'll be gaining some weight doing all of our fine dining at McDonald's and Wendy's.

I suppose I can always get back into the boxes, but, that kind of negates all the work that's been done.

The worst part is, it's just past ten pm and I'm not remotely tired, having slept in the past few days. Don't get me wrong, my back is killing me, but I have to get up early tomorrow to get my blood drawn for all my new meds. I don't have any issues with needles, I just HATE, ABHOR, DESPISE going to the hospital for anything. And to have to go there for something so mundane as a blood-draw???? It literally makes my blood curdle, which means they'll probably have a hard time getting me to bleed enough to do the tests. And yes, I've had that problem before. I'm not proud of it. Apparently, I don't like to bleed. And when I do bleed, I like to stop bleeding quickly. I guess my blood is almost as stubborn as I am. We'll see... Let you know how it plays out, or doesn't, whatever the case may be.

Procrastination or Bust! Day 8

Ok, so I got off to a slow start today, not dragging my butt out of bed until mid-morning. Once I did get started, I got flustered. I decided to start on the kitchen and pack stuff we wouldn't need or use for the next two weeks. Well, it was smart in theory. As I began to pack the first box I started to worry that if I packed everything in order, I would have boxes full of pots and pans that would be way too heavy for anyone to carry, so I eventually decided to pull everything out of the cabinets and put it all in my empty front room; that way I could strategically place things in boxes and not have any one of them be altogether too heavy. ( I had first just started picking things out individually) Smart, right? Maybe for anyone without ADD!
I then had about 4 boxes in front of me, with one item in each, stumped as to what I should put in next. 

I then enlisted the help of Hubby's friend, who, may never have been diagnosed with ADD, but is as easily distracted as I am. This is where it becomes amusing... Being a self-professed foodie, I buy all the gadgets... We've covered this before. The problem arose, when I realized that it wasn't just the kitchen cabinets that we needed to unload.... My food-tech obsession had taken over the ENTIRE closet in our office. Oops. Forgot about that.

So that took about another hour to get all my crap out of the office. I am so proud to say, that after four hours of work, I've managed to pack and tape... ONE...WHOLE...BOX.

At this rate, I might be done with the kitchen sometime toward the end of the summer.

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Day 7, Welcoming the mundane

I have to say it's been rather uneventful the last two days. This leads me to believe it's one of two things. It's either that things are starting to fall in line, or it's just the calm before the storm. Given the fact I still have a crapload of packing left to do, I'm believing the latter on this one.

I have somewhat organized a few things into sections for packing which might make it just a bit easier on me, but every time I turn around there's another pile to be organized.  I have a week and a half left to get everything packed up and organized before we have to load up our final U-Haul.

So, tonight, I choose to revel in the peace and quiet for the rest of the night before I have to get my rear in gear again tomorrow.

I only have one beef, it's mid-May and our weatherman is threatening me with snow... This just reaffirms our choice to relocate to the desert. At least there's only 2 seasons there... hot and and really frickin hot.

Well, I'm off to enjoy my last few moments of peace before I work my fingers to the bone for the next few weeks. Good night all.

Sunday, May 9, 2010

I'm thinking crazy is stalking me now

If Mary Poppins doesn't show up soon, we're gonna have some words. I'm certainly not paying for her services until she actually provides me a service. Unfortunately, her number isn't listed, so maybe I'll have to write a letter and tear it up and throw it in my fireplace.... Isn't that how it's supposed to work for her anyway? Well, if she keeps blowing me off, I'm contacting Nanny McPhee, at least she makes kids' bad attitudes go away. But she's not listed either.... What to do? What to do?
Now, if there were only a magical nanny out there that would make children get along with each other, AND do what Mary Poppins and Nanny McPhee do... Oh, I'd give my left arm for that one!

Either way, any one of those ladies could help me banish the crazy stalker. Maybe I should consult a priest to exercise the demons... But, on second thought, I WOULD like to keep my kids, so maybe that's not the right choice. Besides, they aren't ALWAYS demons.

I thought maybe, just maybe, they would be on their best behavior, today being my day and all... But, kids will be kids. And kids will fight. And fight over NOTHING in particular. Hmmm, I wonder if bribery will work. I'll give it a shot.

A moment of silence for all the moms out there

I'm only asking for a "moment" of silence, because all moms know that asking for anything more than one moment is like asking a politician not to lie. I find it truly amazing that three children, who all happen to be in different parts of the house, can still manage to have a knock-down drag out fight. You could hear the screaming from my house halfway down the block.
You'd think I was beating them senseless, but alas, I try not to break the law on that one, and more often than not, I'm not in any of the rooms with them when the fights break out. Although you may find me huddled in a dark corner in my closet praying for Mary Poppins to magically show up on my doorstep with Burt the chimney sweep to take them to the other realm of sidewalk drawings and fox-hunts.

I find that reality has no place in my fantasy world. Besides, Ed McMahon should be showing up at my doorstep any minute with an over-sized check for 10 million dollars. Wait, is he even still alive? Either way, it's my fantasy, so he is and he's on his way.

Well I guess I'm up NOW- Day 5 (Mother's Day)

Isn't it some sort of cardinal rule to let Mom sleep in on Mother's Day? So much for that one... That's ok. Paybacks a bitch. And I'm REAL good at payback.

As for yesterday's lack of posting, I managed to procrastinate about blogging long enough to forget about it until, well, until this morning. Yesterday my phone was ringing off the hook with questions and status updates for the first U-Haul unloading expedition on the Arizona end. I never did get much packing done around here. And yes, I'm using the constant (although welcome) interruptions as my excuse. It's quite overwhelming trying to get motivated to pack when you know that roughly half of the crap you have should just get thrown out or donated. I need to get one of those portable dumpsters put in my living room and just start tossing. I think my trash to treasure ratio is nowhere near even.

Our new house is roughly twice the size of our current one, but is unfortunately majorly lacking in storage space. I certainly hope there's a Container Store nearby or we're going to end up with crap scattered all over again like we have now. Ugh. Can't handle that much chaos again. If we keep accumulating worthless crap, I'm going to have to consider selling one of the kids. Or maybe I should just quit buying stuff for the kitchen...

Since it IS Mother's Day, I'm going to be focusing my energies on getting my kids organized and their extraneous crap packed for the move. This way, I won't really be doing the packing. I'll be the foreman on the job site, and it will be my gift from the kids to clear out the family room of all their clutter. YAY! What an inspiring thought!

Friday, May 7, 2010

Mind over matter

Ok, it took some soul-searching in the (well-deserved, not) hot bath to figure it out, but it's time for me to take charge of my own emotions. I'm stealing my new mantra from Yoda. "Do or Do Not, there is NO try."
Ya wanna know what? Finally, after thirty years, it really makes sense to me. I mean, I understood it before, but not to the level I grasp now. It really is mind over matter. I can't say I won't ever have moments of self pity, but I can guarantee now, that I'm not going to wallow anymore. If I want good things in my life, I'm going to make them happen. And with that, I say "Suck it Darth Vader!"

Taking the good with the bad

I've just finished my first weeks back on the meds, and I swear they worked faster last time. I've been in a good mood for several hours, and here I go again. Normally, I like my alone time. I'll usually read or catch up on shows, but right now, my attention span is that of a gnat.

What was I saying? Oh yeah, anyway, I'm on the downside of this wonderful condition right now. Typically, I'd be jumping for joy having the house to myself and the kids all playing over at friends' places. It usually gives me an excuse to run around naked cleaning toilets, wait, scratch that, I avoid cleaning toilets no matter my mood. But, you get the gist of it anyway.

I refuse to use this as a forum to complain about what I'm experiencing, so I won't go any further. Just goes to show how quickly things can go up and down.

Day 3

So, the first of our pair of U-Hauls has left the building. Unfortunately, only about two-thirds of what SHOULD have made it in the truck did, due to lack of help on the packing side (me included in the lacking). But we still have another giant U-Haul ready for us in 2 weeks. Which means I have to pull my head out of my ass long enough to be of assistance. And it also means, I better get my ass in gear with the packing. 

Since the U-Haul left the house at 0'dark thirty this morning, I decided I deserved a break from avoiding carrying heavy things, and slept in. Then I watched a couple of my Tivo'd shows and then I took a nap.  It really is an exhausting thing watching people sweat their asses off.

So, at least a little motivation struck, just before the kids got home from school. I decided to clean up the remnants of the garage. Throwing away crap and sweeping. All the dust and leaves have left me feeling dirty. Maybe now I deserve a long lingering bath?

Thank God I don't live closer to my mother, or I'd really be working. She'd have me wiping down the baseboards and hand-picking lint up off of the carpet before I even have the cleaners come. Why is it that most people feel the need to clean, before they have professionals come in to do the job they just did?
Hmm, food for thought.

As a self-confessed foodie, I own ALL things that foodies and technophiles alike dream to own. I spare no expense when it comes to food and technology. (insert, "aw, poor hubby!") I'm quite aware of my addiction and now try to limit myself to a splurge on these items to two or three times a year. If I didn't, my hubby's big-ass paychecks would be gone in a matter of hours, and I'd be impatiently waiting for my next day deliveries, since I refuse to wait any longer for the food mill I didn't know I needed.


I'm not sure if this happens to be related to my bipolar disorder, but I'm claiming it as my excuse, so poo on you if you disagree.


Speaking of food, I think I hear my Williams-Sonoma Catalog calling my name. Check in later!

Thursday, May 6, 2010

Sleepy time.... (yawn) Day 2

Ok, this'll be short and sweet. I am so beyond exhausted today, and already took my sleeping pills. If only I had multiple personalities, then at least one of them could stay up and blog away. I think I'm suffering from some strange side effects being back on my meds. I did get a bit manic and ordered a bunch of kitchen stuff online. But, now, I'm yawning so fricking hard that the tears are runnin' like faucets now.ugh.

Wednesday, May 5, 2010

med alert

I just started new bipolar meds, so I can empathize with everyone new to the diagnosis. I've been diagnosed for over two years and unfortunately ran out of my meds before I was able to get a refill, so I'm back to square one. Part of the reason I'm starting this blog. I've been through it ALL, but I'm also starting over again, so I'm more than willing to help out anybody that asks. I'm a very silly girl and I'm really trying to get back to my EXTREMELY silly ways! I will be more than willing to help anyone find their way back home, I know how hard it can be.

I cry "Uncle!"

Ok, so VERY little loading has been done. I AM a world-class procrastinator, you know. Of course.... I have very little help. Me and hubby's friend. But, the problem isn't that we've been shirking our duties, or that I'm an exceptional wimp, which I am. I choose to blame it on hubby's anal retentiveness. Think military and then multiply that by 1000, and then make it to the 11th power, and then, maybe then, you have hubby's analness. Is that a word? It is now. Anyway, it's really not his fault, but he's not here, so he's easy to blame!

365 days from normal

So far I'm not off to a rocking start with my search for normal. As I look around my dilapidated garage, I'm noticing that any "normal" person would walk in and turn around and walk back out. Talk about overwhelming. I personally think it would be much easier to light a match and collect the insurance and just buy all new stuff. That way, all I'd have to do would be sweep up a bunch of ashes.

But, I think we have too much ammo in the house, it would end up taking out all of my neighbors homes in the blast. Darn the luck. Guess I'll have to get to cleaning. And I really liked that idea. Damn.

stalker alert

I have a housefly stalking me. I think he may want to build his nest in my hair and make babies. EWWWW

I don't think my brain is functioning quite yet- Day 1

OK, so, I'm new to this, but I do have a goal. Firstly, I should start out by saying it's way too early in the morning for me to be attempting this, but alas, such is life.

I'm about to embark on an overly-stressful journey.

The basics: I'm thirty-ish, married to a wonderful man. I have too many absolutely amazing although irritating children, and I suffer from moderate to severe bipolar disorder... Oh, and did I mention I have ADD too? Oh look! A butterfly!

My hubby who is working diligently has lovingly left me to handle our relocation from where I am to major heat next month ALL BY MYSELF! And no, I do not have the luxury of having big burly men to pack, load, and unload our houseful of crap. It's ALL me.

So, I've enlisted the help of a couple of friends to help me organize and load up our first truckload. Should be so much fun. My knees and back are already hurting at the thought of it. As much as I dread the upcoming manual labor, I am very excited about the new house.Where we're moving, not so much. I lived there before we moved to where we are, and specifically remember that the last car that I had there with leather seats still has remnants of my skin melted into it. Desert heat aside, I do miss some aspects of desert. I still have loads of friends there, and there's so much fun stuff to do. Where we are is surrounded by farming and meat packing plants, and a lot of other stinky, smelly things.

Over the next 365 days, I'm going to take you on a journey, sometimes wild, sometimes silly, and maybe even sometimes sad. You won't be hearing boring work rants or stories about how much I hate my boss at least. I'm my boss. Or should I say, my kids are. They are my job now. It's a thankless job, but has it's rewards.
I do promise to entertain. I'm not always so tired and out of it as I am now. Give it a chance, and you won't regret it. Or you will, whatever, I don't know you anyway! To quote one of my favorite chick-lit authors, "Shalom Bitches!"